Another Saturday come and gone....

I am so tired today. I spent the day doing laundry..oh joy! I feel like i didn't accomplish much today.

My body is really doing a number on me. I am so rigid and stiff. Painfully so. Thursday can't get here quick enough. Of course, I am banking on the fact that Dr. R will be able to change my meds and I'll suddenly get my life back. I know...setting the expectation to high.....screaming for failure. But, it's worked every other time, so why not now.

P and I watched another MJF interview on Donny Deutche "The Big Idea" last night. It was probably the most informative interview. It was an hour long interview. At the start of it MJF meds had not kicked in yet so you saw him in the full PD symptoms. He has to sit on his hands and dig his legs into the chair to kept from falling over. Through the course of the interview his meds kicked in and his movements took on a whole different well...movement! It was fascinating. This was his most honest interview I think. You really got to see how this effects him. He is still so positive. I truly draw strength from that.

MJF talked about how lucky he is to have such a supportive family. I am lucky in that respect too. My husband is the most amazing man. I am just so amazingly blest to have him as my husband and now as my caregiver. Let's just look at today as an example.

I got up this morning 7am, could barely move out of bed. Shuffled my way downstairs to pee & take meds. Shuffled back upstairs and climbed back into bed to wait for the meds to kick in. I got into bed and he turned over and rubbed my back. When he got up he came down and cleaned the kitchen, vacuumed the house, ran the dishwasher, fed the dog..then took said dog out, brought laundry down and put what was done away, balanced checkbook & paid bills all before noon. Then at noon, he went and played with our son outside for an hour, then came back in and encouraged me to take a nap b/c he could tell I wasn't doing well. He then went out to the yard and did yard work for two hours. Now, he is sitting doing homework with our son.

What did I do today? 5 loads of laundry....and take a nap...that's it. And he is ok with that. I just love him so much.

I know this is hard for him, and we are real about it. We don't pretend this is ideal, but we do know that we are going to make the best of it. I just hope I am able to recognize those times when it is just overwhelming for him so I can help him get through it.

Monday we are going to a Symposium in Sturbridge for Parkinson's. I am glad he is going with me. I don't think he really wanted to, but he is doing it for me.

He is worried that I am becoming obsessed with my disease. I know what he means, and I think i am borderline. I think once I get my symptoms under control again, I'll calm down about it. I think when my symptoms get back, I want to seek out as much info as I can get. I NEED to figure out how to make it better.

UGH! If only I could get out of this funk I'm in....

That's it for now.

Toodles!