Happy Halloween

B is going as "the scream" this year. Ah, gone are the days of Winnie the Pooh and pumpkins... Now we're into blood and gore. Oh Joy!

Now the big push to the Holidays! We were in Kohl's over the weekend and they were hanging their Christmas decorations. GOOD GRIEF!!! BJ's has had Christmas stuff in their stores since the middle of Sept. It gets earlier and earlier every year.

I am looking forward to the holiday's this year. Not sure why. I think they will be really enjoyable.

I'm getting really frustrated with my PD these days. I just seem to be going down hill more and more everyday. Only a week till my appointment. I asked P if he thought I was getting worse or if it was all in my head. He agreed that it seems to be progressing. I definitely think it's time for new meds. I know it's dangerous territory to go into, but I think it's time. Two years into this diagnosis with out any synthetic dopamine is pretty good I think. I'm ready to get some of my body back. I just hope it works for me.

Trying to stay positive but some days it's just hard.

That's all for now. Have a spooky day! BOO!

On a lighter note...

Fun Stuff
1. YOUR SPY NAME: (middle name and current street name)
Nicole Hoover

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on your dad's side, your favorite candy)
Rose Resses

3. YOUR RAP NAME (first initial of first name, first three or four letters of your last name)
J HIGG

4. YOUR GAMER TAG: (a favorite color, a favorite animal)
Red Cat

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Nicole Bronx

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters of your last name, last 3 letters of mother's maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet's name)
Higgermag

7. JEDI NAME: (middle name spelled backwards, your mom's maiden name spelled backwards)
Elocinreglob

8. PORN STAR NAME: (first pet's name, the street you grew up on)
Midnight Eastlawn

9. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The", your favorite color, the automobile your dad drives)
The Red Ford

10. YOUR ACTION HERO NAME: (first name of the main character in the last film you watched, last food you ate) Lightning Chicken

MJF CBS interview

I just have such admiration for this man. I find it so refreshing that he wants to stay positive. Not an easy task with this disease. He is such an inspiration to me.

I feel this is a huge turning point in the awareness of Parkinson's. I really believe mostly good things will come of all this.

Here is a link to the interview. It's about 20 minutes long but well worth the time.

Toodles!

Michael J. Fox, Stem cells & Rush....

I can't even begin to tell you how upsetting it is that people can make such outrageous comments about a subject they no nothing about.

Rush Limbaugh's comments this week about Michael J. Fox "faking" his PD was just appalling. mp3 of comments What he doesn't get is what he saw was the side effects of the medication that MJF has to take to be able to move at all. His disease has progressed to the point where he must take a high does of a synthetic dopamine (levodopa or LDopa). It is a condition called dyskinesia. Involuntary movements.

It just makes me so sad. Why do people have to be so mean spirited?

On the other hand...there is no such thing as bad publicity. It is amazing that Parkinson's & stem cell research has been in the news for four days now. It can only do good to bring awareness. Maybe people will educate themselves and realize how devastating this disease and what promise stem cell research holds for finding a cure.

This all ties into how I've been feeling about the state of our country lately. We are such a divided place. I worry about the world my son is growing up in. When did common decency go out the window. What happened to people being nice to each other and caring about one another. I can respect people having a different point of view than I do. I may not understand them but it doesn't make me "hate" them. I can appreciate that there are two sides to every issue/story/event.

Not sure what to do about all this. I just know that lately it really has been upsetting.

The ups and downs of PD

So, just the other day I was realizing how much PD is just woven into my life now. It's a part of me now. I've accepted it. Still I have my bad days. I''ve been having one of them today. Just feeling really sorry for myself and wishing I didn't have this stupid disease.

I get so frustrated. I can't do the things I want to do. I am so rigid these days and tired. I have a dr. appt with the neurologist next month (Nov 10th). I am looking forward to seeing her.

I hate going to work these days. Not because I don't like my job because I do, it's just that I know it's all I'll have the energy to do. I can barely handle making dinner, home work with my son (which by the way sucks this year...big time!), then cleaning up. All I want to do when I get home from work is collapse on the couch. I feel like my life is just spent working b/c I don't have the energy to do anything else. I feel like there has got to be something else I could be doing to make my quality of life better. Maybe it is time to think about the levodopa (synthetic dopamine). I don't know. When do you make the decision to cross into that territory. Once you cross, you really can't go back.

On another subject...AQ is doing well. He and his spouse are getting a divorce. It's for the best. Sad..but for the best. I worry most about the kids. They are so young (6 and 2 1/2). She is being a royal bitch. Still won't admit to anything. It's just so sad. AQ is living with his parents right now. That is actually going well. He has to rebuild his life from the bottom up. He has nothing right now. No job, no money, no house, no car....nothing. He puts it in perspective and says that he is really starting with a clean slate. Unfortunately, his spouse is going to make this divorce a nightmare. As it is, she won't let him see the kids. AQ is in the process of getting a court order...but it takes awhile. He is doing most of the legal stuff on his own. He goes to legal aid for advice but he is filing the papers. He doesn't have the money for an attorney. We're working on that...because he is going to need one. His spouse will take him to the cleaners (although he really does have very little at this point) if he doesn't have a lawyer.

Change in subject again....B is doing well. He got the small cast on his arm today. Dr. says he is healing faster than expected. That's good. He'll have this cast on for a week and a half. Then he should be all healed. WHOOHOO!

Things between P & I are great! I love him with all my heart. I am just so lucky to have him in my life.

Last thing.... I am still holding onto this sick hope that I'll get pregnant! What the heck is wrong with me? I need to have my head examined. This is so not something that I could handle now but the selfish part of me just can't let it go. I dream about it at night. I dream of having a little girl. UGH! I wish it would just go away....

That's it...i'm done. I'm going to try and blog more often but I never seem to have a moment to do it.

Toodles!