Well, 2007 ended with a bang.
December was the month from hell. Everything was such a mess. Major leaks in the house, near financial ruin, Christmas almost nonexisitant, keeping husband from completely going off the deep end...
Well, leaks stopped for now..until the next major ice storm
Financial ruin was averted by taking a loan from my 401k
Chirstmas ended up being not so bad.
Husband is still barely hanging onto sanity.
I've been doing ok. Physically I am doing fairly well. Probably best I've been in a long while. I don't want to jinx it so that's all I'm saying.
However, today is a tough day for some reason. I am just so sad today. It started on Friday actually and has just gotten worse each day. I spend the better part of yesterday afternoon crying. I just feel very unloved right now. No reason I should feel that way, I just do. My self confidance is very fragile right now. I feel like I am back in HS. I feel like noone likes me and that noone wants to be my friend. I even fell this way twords my husband. I know...it's odd and completely untrue. It's just the way I am feeling.
I received some news yesterday that I am coming to terms with. I feel guilty for the way I feel about it but it's the way I feel and I can't deny what is a gutteral reaction. I just feel like I am the last on everyones list these days.
Ok, pity party over.
On an up note, I have begun exercising and eating better. Hopefully this year will be better in that area. I have a goal in mind and it is a reasonable goal. I just need to keep making good choices. I hold the power and the control.
I need to start having some me time. Being selfish isn't always bad. Right now I need my world to be about ME. I know that may piss some people off but it's just the way I need to be right now.
Ok, back to work.
Toodles,
Janice
About Me
- TheatreChick93
- Massachusetts, United States
- I am 41 years old. I have been married to my husband for 15 years. We have a son who was born in April 1996. We live in Central Massachusetts with our dog Maggie (a black lab we adopted from the animal rescue league) and our cat Sam (a stray that adopted us) I graduated from college with a BFA in Theatre in 1993 (hence the name) and for a few years pursued a career as an actress. Then life took over and I got married, had a baby and decided to get a "real" job. In November 2004, I was diagnosed with Young Onset Parkinson's disease. In December 2004, I was hospitalized for surgery to remove an ectopic pregnancy. In December 2009, I was laid off from my job. In June 2010, my son was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome at the age of 14. Stick around to see what happens next!
